If your significant other dumped you over Zoom during the pandemic, then you’ve been zumped. This new term, a combination of Zoom and dumped, appeared around April 2020 just after lockdown started. Dating was mainly relegated to video conferencing apps.
Zumping appeared as a new word suggestion for the Collins Dictionary on 17 April 2020. It means to “dump a romantic partner via Zoom or another app” (plainname). The Urban Dictionary’s definition of zumped is to “abandon or desert (someone) via videoconference” (LyricalPoet).
An article written for the New York Post described zumping during the pandemic as “break[ing] up in multiple ways at once…’It didn’t help that the internet connection wasn’t great so we kept freezing, and I said, ‘We’re breaking up’ and we were! It was very surreal,” freelance writer and producer Julia Moser, 26, writes in BuzzFeed of being dumped over the videoconferencing app Zoom this month…For her and others, the app is now a place for conferences and catch-ups; happy hours and heartbreak.'” (Frishberg).
Good Morning America published an article just over two years ago about how the pandemic has changed the dating landscape. Whereas a normal Saturday pre-Covid could be spent in a bar meeting somone you swiped on an app, pandemic restrictions have limited dating to video conferencing apps. Almost half of all adults in the United States are quarantining alone which makes dating apps even more popular but breakups are still the same whether you’ve been ghosted or “zumped.” The article offers tips depending whether you’re the “zumper” or the “zumpee” (Ghanid).
For the ‘zumper’
1. Practice the Golden Rule: Have a script ready so you can deliver your message as gracefully as possible. Winging it often results in harsher words and tones than intended. Deliver a message that you would want someone to give you during a breakup, with compassion and messaging that would be best for you, and you’ll head in the right direction.
2. Leave them alone: Do not call or text to check up on the person. Studies show that both partners heal better with zero contact post-breakup.
3. Reflect: Why did this breakup happen? Was there a specific issue or were you just bored? If you’re bored, and this has been an issue before, you may have a dating pattern that should be addressed.
For the ‘zumpee’
1. Block them: As said above, zero contact is best to heal. As painful as it is, enlist the support of the people in your life who are positive and empathic.
2. Therapy: If the breakup is so painful that you’re having trouble functioning after a week, enlist the help of a virtual therapist to guide you through this time.
3. Be grateful: As sad as you feel right now, and as perfect as you thought the relationship was, it wasn’t. This breakup was a wake-up call about a fundamental incompatibility. Better to know now than to spend months or years in this state.
The We Love Hiphop Network posted a discussion on YouTube about being Zumped.
Social Media Trends as of August 27, 2022
Facebook #zumped: people are posting about this
Instagram #zumped: 16 posts
Google Trends: zumped appeared in late December 2019 and peaked but by the week of May 31, 2020 which suggests lockdown and quarantine restrictions made video conferencing apps the new way to tell your partner that you wanted out of the relationship.
Sources:
Frishberg, Hannah. “Latest trash dating term, ‘zumped,’ is what happens when heartbreak meets Zoom.” New York Post. April 14, 2020. URL: https://nypost.com/2020/04/14/now-theres-a-term-for-getting-dumped-over-zoom-zumped/.
Gandhi, Bela. “Dumped over Zoom: Why ‘zumping’ could be on the rise and how to handle it.” Good Morning America. April 24, 2020. URL: http://Dumped over Zoom: Why ‘zumping’ could be on the rise and how to handle it.
LyricalPoet. “Zumped.” Urban Dictionary. April 17, 2020. URL: https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Zumped.
plainname. “Zumping.” Collins Dictionary. 17 April 2020. URL: https://www.collinsdictionary.com/us/submission/22234/zumping.
We Love Hip Hop Network channel. “Zumped! Dumped On Zoom/ Are The Instagram Vs Battles Fair | We Love Hip Hop S5 E169.” YouTube. April 21, 2020. URL: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nhd0D0ANhVE.